So far, so good.... This time last year, I was in the hospital with low blood counts and an infection called Pseudomonas... I was on IV antibiotics for a month.... was taken off a chemotherapy (Carboplatin) because my blood counts were too low, only to find out later that it is THE drug that researchers believe really kicks my cancer's butt.... I hadn't had any scans or follow up tests, so the question of whether the cancer had spread was first and foremost in my mind.
That was a year ago.
Today, life has done a complete 360: all of my scans and tests this summer showed NED (No Evidence of Disease). My blood counts are on the low end of a normal scale, but they are holding their own and doctors aren't even suggesting transfusions anymore. And although I get tired, it is not the "cancer fatigue" that I remember from my days of pre-diagnosis. I suspect it is an after-affect of treatment kind of tired and even (dare I say it?) a tiredness related to simply getting older.
It could all change in a moment -- I know that. When I start to worry, I work hard to remind myself that everything is fine now and to enjoy the moment. Self-talk, as they call it. I have tests coming up (an MRI on 10/26 and mammogram on 11/3). That always increases the anxiety, but I honestly am hopeful for good news from both tests. The greatest health issues before me are how to lose weight... how to MAKE time for daily walks and quiet time. And, can I please find someone to come and SHOVEL OUT MY HOUSE. One thing people don't realize about cancer treatment is that your life stops, but the accumulation of stuff by your kids and spouse does not.... :-) (Yes, I'm guilty too.... )
My heart breaks for people and families who have a recent diagnosis. I try to listen and encourage and help all that I can. But I also accept that for whatever reason, this is God's best for them in the moment. It doesn't feel that way at the time, but as time passes and you look back, you are blessed if you can find His footprints in your walk. Cancer brings a new normal, and it brings constant challenges/decisions. But, it can also bring His blessing if you let Him know how you are hurting. God cannot comfort you if you will not open the door to Him.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28
Showing posts with label blood counts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label blood counts. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Fourth Chemo & A Family Visit
Today was my fourth chemo -- a short one. We left home just after 8:30 a.m., dropped our puppy and kids off at Paul's sister house (where they swam in her pool all morning), and then Paul and I headed to the hospital for my 11:00 oncology appointment.
We had a good talk with the oncologist. He brought up the study that questions one of the meds I'm taking. He said he knew that less than satisfactory results have been found in the study, but he believes the study focused on breast cancer patients in general. My specific cancer (triple negative) is a particularly aggressive and tricky one to treat -- he still thinks it reasonable to use the med for my treatment. I expected this would be the attitude he would take, but I appreciated that he brought up the information first. He was forthcoming about the study and about his rationale for still using the med. Needless to say, I received the chemo today and will continue to do so as we have originally planned.
Then we talked about my visit to Dr. Kathy Miller next week. He expressed his support of having another doctor's opinion, and emphasized that it didn't bother him to have me going to visit her. It was almost like he could read my mind and knew what words I needed to hear. The power of prayer? I gotta believe to some to extent... At any rate, he even asked me to ask about her about a specific medication which is her expertise. If she thinks it is a good/reasonable med for me, then he will plan to add it to my vast cocktail of drugs. He admitted that he just wasn't sure how affective this drug is for my BC and treatment.
Finally, my doc told me specifically what information Dr. Miller would need to make a good assessment of my case, and we left the hospital with complete path reports and "slides" to take to her next Wednesday.
Our meeting today was not rushed, and was a good, open exchange. Paul was able to ask questions that he has had, and I walked away feeling really good about things. My blood counts were low again (white blood count and hemoglobin). I'll get a shot tomorrow for the white blood count, and he's asked me to start taking iron supplements while I'm on chemo. The shot is not 100% necessary, but he said he'd feel better that I have a boost while traveling next week. Better safe than sorry where an infection and subsequent hospital could happen.
After my chemo, Paul and I went back to his sister's house. She and his parents had dinner for us, Liam played more pool volleyball with Karen and Paul, and then we headed home. A long day, but a good one. During my first round of chemo last year, my parents were up to stay with the kids often. That time was good bonding time for them, as our families live 7 hours apart. The same is happening with the kids and Paul's side of the family this summer. One silver lining of cancer -- improved family relationships! You really start to talk about some of the important things of life, and you make more of an effort to be together and make the best of the time together. At least, that is what I have been finding.
Cancer complicates life, but life still goes on. We leave for my parents house on Friday morning, but we still have so many practical things to take care of before then -- tomorrow I'll call around and eventually get two new tires put on our van.... end of the month is coming, which means I'll spend time paying bills.... we have a window being replaced in the entry of our home on Thursday... Shane has an orthodontist visit on Thursday, Tyler has a follow up to his wisdom teeth surgery early Friday morning.... Paul (and someone else?) needs to run up to our cottage in Manistee before the weekend (long story)....
Life does not stop for chemo or for cancer. How much of this to-do list will be accomplished before Friday morning? All of it in some shape or form. It helps out tremendously that Shane can drive. And, I'm counting on a couple of good post-chemo days to get this all done. As much of it as possible tomorrow, just in case Thursday is a bad day for me. I will not over do, and will pace myself. I promise.
Also, this will probably be the last post for several days -- once I'm in Indiana, I doubt I'll have great Internet access. And my parents will be visiting August 8-10. Shane has his wisdom teeth removed August 8. Things may not likely slow down until after my next chemo on August 11 -- look for an update sometime between now and then. Or soon thereafter.... I think life will be on a slower, even pace by then! :-)
We had a good talk with the oncologist. He brought up the study that questions one of the meds I'm taking. He said he knew that less than satisfactory results have been found in the study, but he believes the study focused on breast cancer patients in general. My specific cancer (triple negative) is a particularly aggressive and tricky one to treat -- he still thinks it reasonable to use the med for my treatment. I expected this would be the attitude he would take, but I appreciated that he brought up the information first. He was forthcoming about the study and about his rationale for still using the med. Needless to say, I received the chemo today and will continue to do so as we have originally planned.
Then we talked about my visit to Dr. Kathy Miller next week. He expressed his support of having another doctor's opinion, and emphasized that it didn't bother him to have me going to visit her. It was almost like he could read my mind and knew what words I needed to hear. The power of prayer? I gotta believe to some to extent... At any rate, he even asked me to ask about her about a specific medication which is her expertise. If she thinks it is a good/reasonable med for me, then he will plan to add it to my vast cocktail of drugs. He admitted that he just wasn't sure how affective this drug is for my BC and treatment.
Finally, my doc told me specifically what information Dr. Miller would need to make a good assessment of my case, and we left the hospital with complete path reports and "slides" to take to her next Wednesday.
Our meeting today was not rushed, and was a good, open exchange. Paul was able to ask questions that he has had, and I walked away feeling really good about things. My blood counts were low again (white blood count and hemoglobin). I'll get a shot tomorrow for the white blood count, and he's asked me to start taking iron supplements while I'm on chemo. The shot is not 100% necessary, but he said he'd feel better that I have a boost while traveling next week. Better safe than sorry where an infection and subsequent hospital could happen.
After my chemo, Paul and I went back to his sister's house. She and his parents had dinner for us, Liam played more pool volleyball with Karen and Paul, and then we headed home. A long day, but a good one. During my first round of chemo last year, my parents were up to stay with the kids often. That time was good bonding time for them, as our families live 7 hours apart. The same is happening with the kids and Paul's side of the family this summer. One silver lining of cancer -- improved family relationships! You really start to talk about some of the important things of life, and you make more of an effort to be together and make the best of the time together. At least, that is what I have been finding.
Cancer complicates life, but life still goes on. We leave for my parents house on Friday morning, but we still have so many practical things to take care of before then -- tomorrow I'll call around and eventually get two new tires put on our van.... end of the month is coming, which means I'll spend time paying bills.... we have a window being replaced in the entry of our home on Thursday... Shane has an orthodontist visit on Thursday, Tyler has a follow up to his wisdom teeth surgery early Friday morning.... Paul (and someone else?) needs to run up to our cottage in Manistee before the weekend (long story)....
Life does not stop for chemo or for cancer. How much of this to-do list will be accomplished before Friday morning? All of it in some shape or form. It helps out tremendously that Shane can drive. And, I'm counting on a couple of good post-chemo days to get this all done. As much of it as possible tomorrow, just in case Thursday is a bad day for me. I will not over do, and will pace myself. I promise.
Also, this will probably be the last post for several days -- once I'm in Indiana, I doubt I'll have great Internet access. And my parents will be visiting August 8-10. Shane has his wisdom teeth removed August 8. Things may not likely slow down until after my next chemo on August 11 -- look for an update sometime between now and then. Or soon thereafter.... I think life will be on a slower, even pace by then! :-)
Monday, July 7, 2008
Second Chemo.... Low Blood Counts
Paul and I got up this morning at 3:40 a.m. to drive to Beaumont (I had to be there at 6:00 a.m.) to have my medi-port surgically installed. We had more waiting than we would have liked (surgery didn't actually start until 8:00 a.m.... ), but it went very well. The nurse found a vein on the first try (yea!), and the port made my chemo today much, much easier.
The chemo I got today was a "short" one -- only the medication Gemzar. The oncology nurses affectionately call Gemzar "bee sting" medication. That's because as the medication goes in through a vein (without a port), your whole arm feels sore and tense like it is being stung by a bee. That is the feeling I had last Monday as the medication went through my vein. This week, as the medication went through my medi-port, I felt nothing! (Smile, Smile, Smile)
But... my oncologist said that my white blood count and my red blood count are both way too low. If I have a fever, he has mentioned putting me in a hospital. I don't think it will come to that for me, but I know he was trying to make a point with me. He succeeded.
Today he gave me medication for the red blood count and tomorrow I have to a Neulasta shot. Not a big deal in the scheme of things; we just hadn't anticipated any shots during this stage of the chemo.
But, I recognize that I have been through an emotional and physical roller coaster in the last two months. I feel whipped, and am not surprised that my body is physically responding in a similar way. My next chemo is two weeks away -- that gives me time to Rest, Eat Well, and Rest....
The chemo I got today was a "short" one -- only the medication Gemzar. The oncology nurses affectionately call Gemzar "bee sting" medication. That's because as the medication goes in through a vein (without a port), your whole arm feels sore and tense like it is being stung by a bee. That is the feeling I had last Monday as the medication went through my vein. This week, as the medication went through my medi-port, I felt nothing! (Smile, Smile, Smile)
But... my oncologist said that my white blood count and my red blood count are both way too low. If I have a fever, he has mentioned putting me in a hospital. I don't think it will come to that for me, but I know he was trying to make a point with me. He succeeded.
Today he gave me medication for the red blood count and tomorrow I have to a Neulasta shot. Not a big deal in the scheme of things; we just hadn't anticipated any shots during this stage of the chemo.
But, I recognize that I have been through an emotional and physical roller coaster in the last two months. I feel whipped, and am not surprised that my body is physically responding in a similar way. My next chemo is two weeks away -- that gives me time to Rest, Eat Well, and Rest....
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